You got yourself into the mess your in and your going to have to get yourself out. Some would call this "accountability." We simply call it being responsible for what you create. If I think about this one hard enough, there is literally no situation that I have not been fully responsible for when it comes to my health and vitality. When I was in college, I willingly participated in drinking beers with my buddies - they never forced me. When I finally got hip to how terrible that was I quit and haven't drank since. There is now no situation that I can justify drinking in and no one will get me to bend on that one. Every time I have missed a training session in my life it was of my own doing - I left work late and got in a traffic jam, I stayed up too late studying and missed my alarm. Nobody to blame but little old me.
The road to radical honesty with yourself will be a bumpy one. But in the end, your success....or your failure will rest squarely on your shoulders, and in hindsight that's where you will want it to be.